- I, for one, am done with you. I am done with having to weed through a nest of, well, face pubes to get to my man’s lips. I said it — face pubes. Oh, I’m sorry — are they something different? Okay, then they are hairy food catchers with an upper net and a lower net. Much less disgusting. In the past six months, I can’t remember one meal where I haven’t had to point out some stray dinner on my man’s FACE PUBES.
- I’ve never been keen on your trend (clearly), but I am not opposed to a wild summer of Tom Selleck lip or a wintery season of Abe Lincoln face. The latter makes great sense — one might need some extra warmth during the frosty months. But summer — COME ON! You cannot tell me that it is comfortable to be breathing through a carpet on a hot summer day. Score one for you Beard and Moustache Trend — you’ve got ’em all fooled.
- My son and I were recently out for ice cream with our own wolfman and right after I told him he had something dripping off his lower hair nest, I spied two males walking by. One was a card-carrying beardo and the other one was the most amazing looking man I’d ever seen.
Watch your step, Beard and Moustache Trend, because I just declared that not having a beard and moustache is the new having a beard and moustache. It’s way cooler to be clean shaven, guys. Hear me? We (I) are (am) not digging it anymore. Time to ditch the Teen Wolf costume (and even he didn’t take it as far as adding a moustache).Face pubes.